Monday, May 14, 2007

White Here, White Now

White has always been a tricky color.

It always looks crisp and clean in the magazines and yet when we buy white, here is what tends to happen:

Situation 1:
We vow to take care of it, washing it only with other whites.
Then reality sets in and due to lack of time or just plain laziness, they end up in the wash with your hot pink underwear or those never before washed dark denim jeans. This then turns your white into either a pale pink, or a light shade of smog. The “formally known as white” top gathers dust in the closet (we feel too guilty throwing it out, I mean we JUST bought it and have yet to wear it)...

Situation 2:
We buy cheap white tops and bottoms, figuring "hey it’s cheap, for sure I’ll wear it" (why, oh why, do we lie to ourselves so?). Then to our amazement, we try them on and realize “oh my” we can see right through the shirt to our belly buttons (not cool). The transparent top is pushed far back into our drawers. Ignorance is Bliss.

Situation 3:
We buy a white tank top, we love it and we wear it all the time. No but really, we wear it alllll the time. We are so attached to it that it would almost feel like cheating if we were to buy another white tank. Then the white tank is no longer really white. You find yourself matching it with more, oh how shall I say, dusty colors in your wardrobe. Then your roommate threatens to throw it out as she feels you really can afford to fork over the $10 to replace what is now the color of an old mattress.

Situation 4:
We buy a white summer dress and freak every time we go by a park bench for fear of attracting dirt or other unsightliness to our bums. We wear the dress with a combination of pride and apprehension. We suddenly mistrust the weather network, developing a constant fear of rain (see 2nd sentence of situation 2). We also find ourselves wondering if a car will carelessly pass by and splash us with a puddle, leaving us muddy and vexed (a bad combination…very bad).

These are a few of the negative, or shall I say interesting situations we go through with the white garment.

However, on the bright side, there is nothing like a crisp white shirt. It has the power to simultaneously say I am ready for a business acquisition yet I will make time to have a crab salad lunch with you at your Hampton’s home. Nothing says I summer on the French Riviera like some white linen slacks. And be honest, how hot is a simple cotton white dress (lined of course) with some crazy accessory (i.e.: Grecian sandals, bangles or a few layered necklaces)? Exactly: it’s very hot. So through thick and thin, we stick with white, accepting the awkward moments but also relishing the good ones (kind of like with a long term boyfriend). You can count on it when you just want to chill and wish to avoid it when you are feeling fat.

The only item left to master in white…the Holy Grail, if you may, of all that is white garments, is the white bathing suit. Not there yet, and neither are my thighs.

Get your White at:

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